[Charismatic]

Very good. I really like it. Keep up the great work man.
Nuclear1- I realy liked you script also. I'd vote for makeing it, sounds great. Id love to see the inside of a Vasudan cap.

[karajorma]

Originally posted by Charismatic
Id love to see the inside of a Vasudan cap.

Have you not played FS2?

[Unknown Target]

Looks neat. My only suggestion is to try and shorten the dialouge a bit (when you're on a ship-to-ship intercom, you try not to talk too much), take out that bit about the Universal Studios thing being superimposed (it's a little supposing and unneeded ).

Other than that, good job, keep it up

[Mongoose]

Originally posted by karajorma


Have you not played FS2?

Has anyone ever been able to figure out what the heck is up with Vasudan architecture?

[Charismatic]

Originally posted by Mongoose

Has anyone ever been able to figure out what the heck is up with Vasudan architecture?

I played FS2 i just dont remember seeing the inside of a vasudan cap.

[Kie99]

When you're stationed on the Psamtik and Later on the Memphis, the main hall screen

[Charismatic]

Ohh ok. Sorry, um, yeah.

But i meant like the rest of the place, the barracks and all that. Would be neet to see. Besides the command deck of the instalation (the 'main hall' [vasudan and terran] IMO is a instalation, or atleast iv always thought it that.) that we see in FS2.

[Jal-18]

It actually tells you pretty explicity you are on a Destroyer.

[theoneofblood]

"Looks neat. My only suggestion is to try and shorten the dialouge a bit (when you're on a ship-to-ship intercom, you try not to talk too much), take out that bit about the Universal Studios thing being superimposed (it's a little supposing and unneeded )."

Yeah, when writing this introductory section, I was faced with a choice; I could either follow the strict rules of the intercom and sacrifice any kind of character anyone would care about, or work a little harder at relaxing the audience into a situation, establishing character and mood, whilst giving out vital information, at the cost of not being technically "realistic".

I chose the latter

As for the "Universal Studios" part, meh, the script will never be made, and I like to have titles completed in my works.

[Ghost]

I like it... very good. My only wish right now is to describe the battle more... you gotta have the Lucy blowing away that Orion. Write more please!

[theoneofblood]

very good. My only wish right now is to describe the battle more... you gotta have the Lucy blowing away that Orion.

Patience my friend, build-up is one of the most exciting things a movie can create. Watch any Sergio Leone western and see what I mean.

[Ghost]

Well, yeah, but if you look at movie scripts, the action scenes are usually very descriptive.

[theoneofblood]

There will be other moments in which you shall bear witness to a great many descriptive battles. This first one acts as a teaser, thus creating more excitement and build-up to where we finally see one, plus allowing more specific focus on a character.

[aldo_14]

Originally posted by Jal-18
It actually tells you pretty explicity you are on a Destroyer.

What with the soundtrack for the hall being the name of said destroyer(s) and everything...........